Saturday, August 7, 2010

Used to...

I used to be an active blogger, posting everyday just hope to seek attention from people that I care.
I used to be so stupid, thinking that everything that I wrote, they will eventually read it, and then will get to know more about me and what I wanted.
Since when I had lost the initiative to write anymore? Then when I want to start to write again, I found it was hard for me to make a start.
Sometime when I had made the start, I just didn't know how to continue it...
Sometime, I just couldn't make an end.

U may find my post are mostly hanging somewhere, bring you to nowhere after reading it.
Is that also implying how am I right now?
I don't used to express my own feeling anymore, since...
I've been keeping myself too much at the deepest place of my heart. I never wished to dig it out again, because I knew I'm gonna live a better life than dwelling back to the past.
But somehow, the past was the thing which affected the most on how are you gonna be now.
Because of you were afraid of something in the past, therefore you won't ever go near or do that same thing again, although you know you might be getting a different results.
Is this showing that I'm kind of always feeling insecure inside? I tend to think alot, and react against my rational thinking. I could be a reasonable person when I was asked to give opinion on other people's stuff, but not my own stuff.

Perhaps this is the post to boost me to write again :)
This is what I got today, more than all the others I had in my draft, over the past year...

Thank you~ for reading it, if and only if.. someone found this blog.

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